


wish i were leia

by foreverobessed



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Boys Kissing, F/M, Han is a bit of a dick, Leias oblivious, Luke Skywalker Angst, Luke Skywalker Needs A Hug, M/M, POV Luke Skywalker, Song Lyrics, Song fic, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:22:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25812022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foreverobessed/pseuds/foreverobessed
Summary: Luke Skywalker has always been in love with Han Solo, but he only has eyes for his sister.OR“Heather” by Conan Gray but a Star Wars fanfiction.
Relationships: Leia Organa/Han Solo, Luke Skywalker/Han Solo
Comments: 10
Kudos: 79





	wish i were leia

**Author's Note:**

> I told myself I’d write skysolo fluff but I ended up with angst. ONE DAY I WILL writE SKYSOLO FLUFF! The main reason I wrote this is bc the skysolo ao3 deserves more works, so here we go :)) hope y’all enjoy!! also if you leave some skysolo prompts in the comments I (might) pick one or two of my favorites to write!!

_ I still remember third of december  _

Luke can remember the day as clear as a summer’s sky, he was in high school and it was cold. Ever since Luke was a child he could never handle the cold (like his father), but he was running late and he didn’t have enough time to grab a jacket, a sweater, a hoodie, anything. So he stood waiting outside the school for his mother to pick him up. The wind was blowing, and the ground had frost on it, it looked like it about to snow.

_ Me in your sweater, you said it looked better on me than it did you  _

Luke was standing outside of the school, near the doors of the school. Mostly everyone had left for school, except for the people who had sports or clubs or any other extracurricular. His school was very adamant about leaving the school as soon as possible, no dilly dallying. They had over 700 kids leaving the school; they didn’t have enough room for people to be waiting.

Luke heard the doors swish open from behind him and a comment of, “yeah Mr. Smith I’ll quit loitering.” He looked behind him and met the eyes of Han Solo. When Han saw Luke a grin appeared on his face. 

“What are you doing out here, kid?” Han said, walking up to stand behind him. 

“Mom’s gonna pick me up. Leia’s in a debate club competition at the moment. She’s probably winning.” Luke added on, not having quite enough guts to meet Han’s eyes. Luke was a Sophomore, he was put forward a year along with his sister. Han was a Senior; he always seemed so unattainable. His cocky smirk haunted Luke wherever he went. He had met Han last year, and ever since then they had been friends. When Han wasn’t with him or Leia, he was found with Chewie, a foreign exchange student, and Lando. Leia and Han were always bickering, they always had their eyes on each other but Luke had his eyes on Han. Luke shivered as the wind grew harsher.

“You seem cold, kid.” Han noticed, standing by Luke and their shoulders brushing. The simple touch made shivers go down Luke’s spine. It was crazy how a simple touch made Luke stand on end. 

“No, shit.” Luke stated bluntly, holding his arms together over his chest and shivering. 

Han grinned when Luke cussed, something Luke didn’t do that often. Han looked up at the cloudy sky then back at Luke. His brow furrowed slightly, before he began taking off the light blue sweater he had on. It was a school sweater, their school name labeled in bold white font.

“What are you doing?” Luke said loudly, a teacher walking down the stairs looked at them oddly before carrying on to her car. She shook her head in fondness, her keys making noises with every step she took.

“What does it look like?” Han asked, he took off the sweater completely. Underneath it, he had on a thick long sleeved with some automatic store name on it. “Giving you my sweater.” He balled the sweater in his hand and held it out to Luke.

“But… you’ll be c-cold.” Luke shivered as the wind grew harsher around them. 

“We both know, kid, that you can’t handle the cold. On the other hand? I can. Chewie’s waiting in the Falcon with the air on, I’ll be fine.” The Falcon was an old piece of junk van that should not be able to go as fast as it does. Luke on several occasions helped Han and Chewie fix it up. 

“Are you s-sure?” Luke stuttered out, the thought of wearing something that Han owned made his heart hammer in his chest. 

“Yeah, I’m sure. I wouldn’t be offering if I wasn’t,” Han said, with a small smile on his face. 

Luke put his backpack down, and grabbed the sweater from Han. While he was putting it on he noticed that it was too big for him, he adjusted the sweater, tugging it up slightly so it didn’t look as big. It was warm from Han’s body heat. “How do I look?” Luke asked jokingly, holding out his arms to emphasize the size difference between the two of them. The sleeves sagged down slightly. 

“Looks better on you then it does me.” Han said with a grin, which made Luke’s cheeks heat up.

“T-Thanks, Han. I appreciate it.” Luke said, smiling at Han and putting back on his backpack.

“No problem.” Han said, and looked up at the sky when it started to softly snow. “Just in time.”

_ Only if you knew how much I liked you _

Luke smiled as Han and Leia bickered across from him. They sat in this old 80’s diner with the checkered print flooring and all. They were arguing about what milkshake flavor was best; of all things to argue about. Luke fiddled with the straw in his strawberry shake, and Chewie shook his head in fondness at the two in front of him. 

Lando sat on his other side and turned to Luke, sipping a fry in ketchup before eating it, “Do they always do this?” Lando hadn’t really hung around Leia and Han together. 

“You have no idea.” Luke said, stirring his straw around in his shake before taking another sip. Chewie echoed in agreement. 

When Han grinned at Leia it made his heart stutter in his chest, Han didn’t know how Luke felt about him. He probably never would. Luke was… well,  _ Luke.  _ Luke was small and well, different. He was different from Leia, or Han’s other ex Q’ira. They weren’t afraid to say their mind, or snap back. They were confident, strong, and stood tall. Luke wasn’t. Luke was awkward, and usually kept his attention to his studies. 

Han could never like Luke, and Luke realized that, but it didn’t really make it hurt any less. 

_ But I watch your eyes as she walks by, what a sight for sore eyes  _

_ brighter than a blue sky, she’s got you mesmerized while I die  _

It was obvious how Han felt about Leia, and Leia about Han. The little look in his eyes he had when he looked at her, it was reserved just for her. The little soft smile he’d give her as she did something particularly amazing. The way his eyes would drift from her eyes to her pink, plush lips just for a  _ little  _ too long. The way their hands would brush more than they should. 

It was obvious for Leia too, at least to Luke. They lived right across the hall from each other, and he was her brother. He knew Leia probably better than he knew himself. He usually kept his mouth shut and watched, and that’s how he knew these things. He knew how Leia would grin and smile extra wider around Han. He knew that one of the main reasons Leia argued with him so much was because she needed to cover up the fact that she liked him. It wasn’t obvious to everyone else that Leia liked Han, but it was to Luke. 

Luke and Han would be walking in the hallways, chatting and Leia would walk by with Winter, and Han’s eyes would drift to Leia. He saw the way they looked at each other; with such adoration in their eyes. They were too caught up in each other, to notice Luke looking at Han the same way.

_ Why would you ever kiss me? _

It was a starry summer night, and Han was driving Luke home from the movies. They had gone with Lando, Leia, and Winter. Leia was staying the night with Winter so she got a ride home with her, and Han had offered Luke a ride and he took it.

The radio seemed almost silent as Luke watched the stars as the Falcon went slowly over hills. “What are you looking at?” Han asked, Luke turned to look at Han and he noticed Han was watching him, so intently. 

“The stars.” Luke said plainly, turning to drape his arms out the window. 

Han made a little “huh” sound before pulling over to the side of the small, backroad. 

“What are you doing?” Luke asked, confusion on his face as Han got out of the car. He got out of the car as well, and pulled another look of confusion as Han sat on the hood of the car. 

“Figured you could at least have a seat.” Han said, gesturing to the stars and leaning back on the car.

Luke sat beside him, and laid down next to him. Their fingers brushed and Luke could feel the warmth rolling off Han. “That’s Draco.” Luke said, pointing at a constellation. 

Han hummed, “Tell me more.”

Luke continued to point out constellations like Ursa Major and Minor, Cassiopeia, Andromeda, and Serpens. Luke tilted his head slightly, to meet Han’s eyes. He felt himself flush. They didn’t have a lot of room in between them.

“What is it?” Luke asked in a hushed tone, he couldn’t take his eyes off Han, he just seemed hypnotizing. Luke had never had Han look at him this intently, ever. 

“Just you, kid.” Han said in a low, husky tone. Han leaned forward and sealed their lips together. His hand went to Luke’s hip. Luke was confused, before putting his hands on the back of Han’s neck and kissing back. Han’s tongue slid into his mouth and he moaned. 

Han pulled back and grinned at him, tucking a blonde lock behind his ear. Luke knew his whole face was red. “You blush pretty.”

_ I’m not even half as pretty  _

It was the next day at school, and Luke was still blushing from their kiss. He couldn’t get Han off his mind, and after he got his books he walked to Han’s locker. He peeked his head around the corner to see Leia and Han kissing passionately. Leia was wearing the sweater Han had given him in December, his hands were cupping her cheeks and her hands were on his shoulders. 

He ducked back around the corner, holding his back to the wall. He squeezed his eyes shut, and calmed his breathing. Of course he’d go for Leia! Of course! He didn’t know why he thought Han would ever go for him, it was stupid. Luke was  _ stupid.  _

_ You gave her your sweater, it’s just polyester, but you like her better _

_ I wish I were Heather _

Han and Leia had made it official, they got together the same night him and Luke kissed. Luke guessed after he dropped Luke off he went to Winter’s house and talked to Leia about it. Luke was quieter since then, not that anyone really noticed except his parents. He had started hanging out with his other friends more often. He had started not hanging out with Chewie, Han, Lando, and Leia as often. He was found around Wedge, Biggs, Hobbie, and Dak more often than not.

He just couldn’t see Leia and Han together.. it just wasn’t something he liked to see. It didn’t help that Leia had started bringing Han over, of course he had charmed his mother. He had even helped Leia sneak him in, at night sometimes he could hear Han’s soft words whispered to Leia, and Leia’s muffled moans. 

He didn’t know why he still covered for Leia, but he did. Luke shouldn’t, and he knew that. It was in the middle of the night, a Saturday night, and Luke had gotten up to get some sleeping pills. It was three in the morning, and he still hadn’t slept. 

While on the way to the bathroom, he turned the corner and a body met his. He fell flat on the floor, and groaned slightly. 

“Oh, sorry.” A male voice said, and Luke knew it was Han. Han offered his hand and Luke took it. Luke looked Han over and he was wearing only his underwear. “Haven’t seen you in a while, kid.”

“I’ve just been… busy.” Luke said lamely, crossing his arms over his chest, almost hugging himself.

“Busy, huh?” Han said, teasingly. “When are you ever busy? Hanging out with your other friends?”

Luke nodded, looking at the ground and bouncing on the balls of his feet. He didn’t want to have this conversation standing in his flannel pajama pants and wearing his animal crossing hoodie. 

“Seriously, what happened, kid?” Han asked, adopting a softer tone. “I haven’t really seen you since.. we..”

“Kissed?” Luke finished, and Han nodded like it was just.. nothing. “Why would you ever even kiss me?” Luke said it harsher, and slightly louder. 

Han chuckled a little awkwardly and tensely, “What?”

“I’m not even half as pretty.” Luke said, slightly glaring at Han. “You gave her your sweater, it’s just polyester, but you like  _ her  _ better. I wish I were Leia.” Luke said, almost bitterly. 

Han looked a little flabbergasted for words, “Kid I-“

“It doesn’t even matter anymore.” Luke mumbled, looking down at his feet and back up at Leia. “You’re with  _ her,  _ and you got together with her the first night that we  _ kissed!  _ Like that kiss meant nothing, like I mean nothing!”

Han looked exasperated, “Luke, it’s not like that, I do like you-“

“But you don’t!” Luke whisper-yelled, trying not to wake up his parents or alert Leia. “You don’t and that’s fine. It’s just the fact that you treated our kiss like it meant nothing! I never expected you to like me… b-but kissing me and getting together with Leia the same night? That’s a little low, even for you, Solo.”

“Kid, you’re overreacting.” Han said defensively, “We just need to talk this out-“

“I don’t want to talk about it!” Luke said harshly in a quiet tone, “It doesn’t even matter anymore! Why do you think I haven’t been around you two anymore? Just.. I want to be left alone, okay? I need time.”

Han opened his mouth to say something, but Luke walked past him to go to the bathroom and take one of his sleeping pills. Luke put one on his tongue and used the faucet to swallow water to wash it down. He wiped his mouth with his sleeve and walked back to his room.

_ Watch as she stands with her holding your hand, put your arm ‘round her shoulder now I’m getting colder  _

_ But how could I hate her? She’s such an angel, but then again kinda wish she were dead  _

Luke watched Leia and Han in the hallways as they passed, it was getting colder again and Han’s arm was wrapped around Leia’s shoulder, pulling her closer. Luke had started hanging out with them again, and it was beginning to be more like what it was before. Leia still had no idea about him and Han’s kiss.

Luke could never hate Leia, no matter what. She was his twin sister, his second half, his best friend. They were going to be intertwined for the rest of their lives, but that never stopped him from envying her. He was jealous of the way she seemed so confident, so unmoved by anything. She seemed so strong, she never held her tongue, never scared of what other people might think of her. Their parents always seemed so impressed by Leia, but never really by him, and it was fine he was use to being the one pushed to the side. He didn’t really care anymore being the one not in the spotlight, and he didn’t want to be in it anyway, but it would be nice for his parents to be impressed by him, and Luke was fine with pretending he was fine with Leia and Han, because he had been pretending his whole life that he didn’t have feelings for Han anyway

**Author's Note:**

> HOPE YALL LIKED THAT!! I promise one day I will writE fluff and it’ll come sooner than you think ;) Also do I think Padmé and Anakin are bad parents? ABSOLUTELY NOT. Do I think leia would be oblivious? NO. Do I think Han is a dick like this? NO. is Luke obviously different than in canon? YES. but I just wrote it like this to fit the song better :)
> 
> ANYWAY HAVE A GREAT MORNING AftERNOON OR NIGHT!! Remember you are loved x


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